“7 weird things” meme

I got tagged by my good friend BetteJo for a weird things about me meme. I could probably take HOURS to fill ya’ll in on all the weird things about me but thankfully I’m only required to do seven. My normal theory is to reveal my weird little by little, so as to seem less offensive. But BetteJo asked for it, so here it is!!

1) I was born with three thumbs. Yeah, you read that right. No, I’m not including a picture. I don’t have the third thumb any more. I do have a bumpy thumb from where it was surgically removed. In grade school my teacher Mr. Lemon, aka Butthead Supreme, made fun of the offending bump and I ran home from the playground in tears. Mr Lemon (yes, that’s his real name) is not safe should I ever meet him again. For a long time, if someone would notice my lumpy thumb, I’d just say I slammed it in a door. It was easier than admitting I was deformed. When I was born, my very saddened mother believed she had done something bad to deserve a child with a club thumb. She cried and cried. I only have one picture of my extra digit before they lopped it off because my mother wouldn’t hear of photographing it. I counted my own children’s fingers and toes very very carefully when they were born. According to Mom’s rule, I should have had children with eight toes and four lips!!!!

2) My favorite cat ever was named Hobbs. He was an orange tabby that had extra toes on all four feet. He ate popcorn and would lick my fingers if I ate oranges. Hobbs never ever slept any higher on the bed than my calves. He would lick my tears away when I cried. Miss that cat.....

3) The celebrities that I think are hot and on my list are freaky weird to most of my friends. I think Steven Tyler is ohwowsexy, and equally love Sean Connery. I could listen to Sean Connery all night. Sean Connery will be sexy until he is 199. Yowsa. Sam Elliott is and will always be smokin’ hot. He has this rough, sexy, take me or don’t thing. Um...okay!! Sam Shepard still has it. I’d take him over Brad Pitt any day. (The Pittster is overrated, in my humble opinion. He hasn’t been hot or real since Thelma and Louise.) Mr Yammering knows about this list, and he makes sure to point out when one of them are on TV. That being said, I will still be teased for this part of the meme. He cannot help himself!

4) I have always rooted for Dracula and the Frankenstein Monster. Drac is just looking for more family, after all, and for some good eats after dark. I can understand that. Frankenstein’s Monster isn’t a monster at all, but the product of his creator. I understand that, too. Neither one of them is perfect, they have a lot of unique features, and they have an uphill battle. I completely get that. In the classic movies, I always rooted for them to survive, even get away with the girl. I’m always sort of disappointed for them when they don’t get what they wanted.

5) I have a hard time watching movies like the Omen or anything to do with spiritual or haunting horror. I cannot watch them alone, and I can barely watch them with Mr Y in the room. In fact, Mr Y actually had to finish watching White Noise and then tell me about it so I could finish it with him. I’ve only made it half way through several movies. If there is a death of a child in the movie I’m watching, you can pretty much count me out. Carrie scared the piss & grits out of me as a little girl. I couldn’t sleep with my hand over the edge of the bed for months...okay years....after I watched that movie. Oddly enough, I thought Fred Krueger was funny. And vampire movies don’t bother me at all. I do still try to watch some seriously scary movies, tho, to be near my husband. But I usually don’t do well.

6) Blowing my nose is a last resort. Really. Unless I can’t breath, you won’t see me blow my nose. Ever. Snot blowing down the nostril sounds more disgusting than anything I can imagine. It gives me the chills. I cannot stand to hear anyone else blow their nose. I help my kids do it, but I cringe the whole time. I broke up with more than one boyfriend because he blew his nose AT THE TABLE while we were eating dinner. I saw and heard that and I was outta there. I’d rather run and wipe, take meds, or put a little twisted piece of toilet paper up my nostrils than hear that noise. Yuck to the highest power. My mother still blows her nose at the table. I still get up to leave. Um....ew. Oddly enough, snot doesn’t really bother me. It’s more the sound it makes. I’ve been a human snot rag for my kids more times than I can count. I think it’s more the SOUND that grosses me out. Can’t stand it. Another sound that gets me is when someone sucks on clothing. That gross dry slurping sound. In second grade, Joey (whoever) used to suck on the strings of his zip up sweatshirt. Gave me the chills. My children tried that once, too. But Just ONCE, I promise you. BLAHGH.

7) My grandfather G used to tell me that the ‘titty fairy’ was going to show up one night while I was sleeping and give me boobs. He chased me around his house with a bicycle pump and screamed “the titty fairy is coming, the titty fairy is coming”. I can’t make this shit up, folks. He really did that. It was my father’s father. That man was freaking sick. He named his dog chi chi, which means titty in Spanish. (Correct me if I’m wrong SueBob!!) There was nothing appropriate about that man. Nothing at all. The summer after Mom jumped out of that window, we three girls lived with Grandpa G in Jacksonville, Florida. I had just witnessed my mom’s lovely leap, living in a strange place, it’s no wonder I began to wet the bed. (I was three or four??) Anyway, he punished me by putting a DUNCE cap on my head. It looked like a cone-shaped wizard hat and it spelled D U N C E down the front. He made me wear that hat and stand behind the TV for hours after I had an accident. If he were home I had to stand, but when he was gone, Grandma would let me sit. He ‘spanked’ me severely when his TV stopped working properly. Hey, I was a baby and I had nothing else but the dials in back of the tube to play with! It was a wonder I didn’t electrocute myself!!! If I were allowed to go outside, he made me wear a dish towel as a diaper for everyone to see. I had self esteem issues and I didn’t know where it stemmed from until I got to be much older. Go grandpa! (Oh, and yes, the ‘titty fairy’ did indeed arrive. And apparently, she brought friends.....)


Wellthen, I guess now I need to tag five folks. Who should I tag?? Hmmmmm..... Well, now that her cherry is busted, and she actually owes me a meme from last year, I’m going with Jodie at Useless_Ramblings. That’s a good start. I’m also tagging:

Inner Dialogues
ROC Rebel Granny
Schmutzie
The Adventures of T & Super B
Green Eyed Mama

If you all don’t feel like doing the meme, at least you can appreciate the linky love!!!

Now I’ll have to let them know I’ve tagged them and they can tag five people, but yikes, the rules are made to be broken!!! I say tag as many as you want!!